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Live Archives - Page 9 of 12 - Itch.world

A three-minute escape to Italy.

Tuscany, travel, medieval village, Italy, festivals, celebrations, customs, cooking, recipes, living in Italy, moving to Italy, visiting, visit, restaurants, language

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February 23, 2019 In Best Of, Live By Nancy

Nonna net

Soon after we arrived in our village we got a lesson about the effectiveness of the nonna network in Italy.

During our first year in Tuscany what helped the most to get our non-Italian speaking kids thriving in the all-Italian local schools was a couple of sent-from-the-Gods tutors who helped with the transition. They’d pick the kids up at school, check in with the teachers and find out what was coming up the next day, but what became the most important in many ways, take them to the family lunch before starting in on homework. One of Sebastian’s tutor’s grandmothers often cooked for the extended family, plus Sebastian, and got to know him very well.

One day John and Sebastian were walking across the piazza and the grandmother came rushing towards Sebastian, obviously upset and concerned. She started talking to Sebastian in very loud, rapid-fire Italian, her five-foot tall frame towering over his eight-year old height. At the end of what seemed to be an epic scolding she gave him a huge hug and walked away.

John asked, “What was that all about?” “Nothing,” said Sebastian.

So we called the granddaughter, who spoke some English, and got the story. Living in a small village our kids ran free a lot. Apparently earlier in the day Sebastian had been taking a walk with a very attractive local mom and her young son on the path that runs next to the top of the ancient walls of our hill town. This defensive wall is at least 50′ high and the top of it has a flat surface about two feet wide. It drops from the lower part of our village to the valley and helped protect the town from invaders. Sebastian decided to show off, so he jumped up onto the top of the wall to walk for a bit.

But his brief high-wire act had been spotted by a grandmother, who none of us knew, as she was looking out her window. She immediately called her friend, Sebastian’s adopted grandmother, and explained that she saw him break a big village rule: no walking on the wall. She thought her friend would want to let her young American friend know how dangerous this was.

And we learned our first of many lessons that prove that Italian grandmothers rule. They take responsibility for enforcing village mores, and such a transgression would warrant an instant phone call to a friend to rectify—the nonna net in action.

February 23, 2019 In Lingua By Nancy

Word of the week: magari

This a word that I hear all the time and that can be used to mean a lot of different things. The dictionary translates it simply as “maybe” or “if only” but that just scratches the surface of how useful this word is.

You can use it to express “Of course! I’d love to!” as in an ironic a response to whether you’d like to go to Paris for the weekend (implying “Of course! If only”).

It often has a strong wistful sense, a kind of “if only” from deep in the soul. “How I wish it was true.” The kind of word you’d pull out to express the regret of a relationship that should have ended differently: “Magari it could have gone differently.” It can also has a meaning of “God willing,” as in things like passing one’s exams, or finding great fortune. This meaning can be accompanied by a bit of a shrug and wave of both hands.

The last set of meanings are “maybe, and what if” “Magari we should open a bottle of wine,” “What if magari we get to the restaurant and they don’t have room?,” or “Magari he would notice she dyed her hair red” are all situations in which magari would be perfectly at home. For starter usage, though, you can’t beat the wistful look into the distance and slight shrug of its “what if” meaning.

Magari you can now speak Italian.

February 17, 2019 In Best Of, Chow, Live By Nancy

Three ways Italy is different from California

During a frenzied week back in California, where I lived for most of my life, I was stuck by hundreds of differences between the Bay Area and my adopted home in Tuscany. Here are three of the stranger things I’ve noticed this week.

Dogs

Lola in a restaurant in a high chair. The owner insisted in bringing it out for her so that she wouldn’t have to be alone on the floor.

Right after we first moved to Tuscany our friends’ dogs had puppies, and we got our Lola. Having a dog has been a great window into some of the differences between Italy and the States.

Most Italians love dogs and they are welcome everywhere. Lola comes with us into restaurants, hotels, movie theaters, banks, post offices, trains… She frequently gets served a bowl of water in a restaurant before we even order. Once she and I went into a caffè and she happened to see one of her favorite dog friends. The woman who works behind the bar encouraged us to take the dogs off their leashes so that they could play. Lola and her boyfriend started romping in the caffè, bumping up against people and racing across the floor underfoot. At one point her dog friend got a little over excited and lifted his leg to pee against the bar. His owner and I froze, horrified. The other bar patrons and the owner burst out laughing and she shooed us away as we attempted to clean up the mess and insisted on doing it herself.

A couple years ago I had a minor medical procedure. When I was in the recovery room coming out from anesthesia John mentioned that Lola was tied outside the hospital. The nurse suggested that we bring her into the recovery room so that she could snuggle in bed with me and escape the heat outside. So Lola joined me in bed in the hospital room.

The kids, Lola, and I were enroute back from a long day in Florence and stopped for hamburgers. I had forgotten to bring food for Lola so she hadn’t eaten all day. Donella mentioned this to our waiter, and he and the kitchen staff went into high gear, immediately cooking a burger for Lola and bringing it out on a plate.

I can’t even imagine a parallel to any of these experiences (and there are many more) in California. The additional range of places Italian dogs go, and the experiences they have, seem to make them a bit smarter in the ways of the world, a bit more “emotionally intelligent,” than their stateside counterparts. Probably helps that most Italian dogs I see aren’t purebreds and are bred much more for personality than looks.

Of course not all dogs in Italy are pets. In our rural area I’d guess about twenty five percent of the dogs I see are working dogs—hunting dogs for wild boar and truffles, dogs that protect sheep from wolves. These dogs are not at all coddled and often live outside full time.

Lunch

In Italy lunch is probably the single most important event of the day. The world stops for a couple of hours. Stores and offices close. School ends at 1:30 so that kids can join their families. Streets empty and the pace of life changes. Because everything shuts down it means there’s no social demarcation between people who have time for lunch and those who work through. We frequent restaurants populated by workmen, delivery truck drivers, and laborers, as well as those filled with businessmen and ladies who lunch, all lingering over a meal that lasts over an hour.

The meal is usually two to three courses—pasta, main, and dessert—accompanied by wine and coffee. People linger, talk, laugh, relax. The work day ends at 7 or 8 in the evening, but they have had this total break in the middle.

On one of my first trips back to California after we moved I raced across town to get to Target before 1:30 so that I could get what I needed before they closed for lunch. About ten minutes into my drive I realized I probably wouldn’t have that problem in Emeryville.

In the Bay Area it often feels like lunch is something to be accomplished as efficiently as possible—ideally the optimal mix of organic protein, carbs, and fat, at the right price point, consumed as efficiently as possible—so that you can get back to the “real” business of living, the important stuff that defines us. What if it turns out in the game of life that the really important thing was the lunch with friends?

Coffee

This week I’ve had time to kill between meetings so I’ve been hanging out in various coffee places, chains and independents, and noticing the differences between what it means to get coffee in Italy and in California. There are lots of obvious ones—in Italy you stand at the bar for your shot of espresso. People don’t get coffee to go. Coffee is never served in paper cups. There are no huge cups filled with 1,000 calorie mocha pumpkin unicorn frappuccinos. Cappuccinos are only had in the morning—in the litany of Italian health rules it’s believed that dairy is bad for the digestion after about noon. In California, nobody ordered a caffè corretto (literally a corrected coffee), an espresso with a healthy shot of grappa, sambuca, or some other liquor, often served late morning (or pre-dawn if you are going out with friends and loaded guns to hunt.)

But the biggest thing I’ve noticed is that having a coffee in Italy is a social act. Everyone is talking at once and standing in a group at the bar drinking shots of espresso. A visit to the caffè happens first thing in the morning, mid-morning, and mid-afternoon and waves of people congregate at these times, eager to see what is new with everyone else since when they last saw them a few hours before.

An espresso is 1€, and a cappuccino 1.20€, so people often pay for one another’s coffees. I’ve had mine picked up a lot, often by someone I haven’t even talked to that day. When you go to pay you discover it’s already been covered. There’s no weirdness in this, like there can be if someone buys your drink in a bar, and absolutely no expectation of anything in return. It’s a small flirt that puts a spring into both people’s steps, and all at for 1€. I can’t think of a comparable act in the U.S.

In contrast, I couldn’t help but notice how non-social the act of getting coffee is in California. There are a few people chatting in line, and a tiny minority of tables with people actually talking to each other, but the vast majority of people seem to be alone, focused on their computers or phones, mostly with headsets on, and completely removed from the environment and people around them. The difference is jarring—the only common factor between having coffee in the two worlds is caffeine.

January 27, 2019 In Best Of, Chow, Live By Nancy

Spezzatura di maiale: nose to tail in action

After living in Tuscany for six years we were lucky enough to be invited to one of the most storied family events in Italy—the spezzatura di maiale—or the dividing of the pig. This tradition of using all parts of the pig has inspired chefs from Fergus Henderson of St. John in London—whose restaurants and cookbooks have popularized the idea of “nose to tail”—to Samin Nosrat, who filmed a pig being butchered in Italy for her cooking series “Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat.” An invitation to spezzatura di maiale offered the chance to go deeper than the popular coverage to see what this tradition is like in a family setting, as it has been done for generations.

For the majority of people in Italy, for hundreds of years, raising a pig was everything. I’ve learned that the ideas we have about the bounty of the Italian countryside are largely a modern construct. For most of history everyone but the aristocracy was barely getting by. Many of the oldest generation still living were raised in conditions of near-starvation because of Mussolini’s agricultural policies—for many years in the 1900s even plain pasta was a luxury. It was difficult to raise a pig to maturity because it required enough excess food to feed it. If at all possible, people raised two, one for their own use and one for the doctor. A kind of early medical insurance.

The pig is slaughtered in the winter because it is colder—the whole world becomes a refrigerator. A day or so after the pig is killed the spezzatura happens, which is a full day of work for four men (this seems to be an almost exclusively male task). Since the middle ages there have been butchers, called norcini, who traveled from town to town during the winter to do the spezzatura. Their skill with knives also made them the default surgeons and dentists.

After the intricate and precise work of cutting up the pig and making sausage, pancetta, salumi, prosciutto, and other things pork, there is a feast shared with friends and neighbors. When other families kill their pig it is their turn to host the festa. According to the family we joined this tradition has been largely unchanged during their lives, and it provides an opportunity to have some favorite foods, which are only available on this day.

We had no idea what to expect, and being a morally conflicted meat eater, I braced myself to be unnerved. But there was something about the atmosphere—the complete focus and attention of the men, the immaculate room, and the use of nearly every last part of the pig—that left me with feeling more of deep respect for the animal than anything else. This is an event that is not taken lightly. Very little of the meat is consumed fresh. The majority is preserved for use throughout the coming year. At the end of the day there were a couple of bones left, and that was it. Organs, skin, fat, cartilage … everything else was carefully used.

A bonus is that a breed of pig that was endangered, the Tuscan cinta senese, is now safely off the endangered list and thriving, because so many small farms, including this family, are raising them.

January 27, 2019 In Live By Nancy

You will die

When I first moved to Italy I was amazed by all the things I did on a regular basis that I was warned were actually dangerous. Going outside with wet hair, even if it was mid-summer. Not wearing a scarf to protect my delicate neck from any wind. Drinking coffee that was too hot. Drinking water that was too cold. Not bundling up while, or after, exercising. Eating overcooked pasta that is not properly al dente. Sweating. Sleeping with the window open when there is a breeze. Getting a chill of any kind. Walking around barefoot in the house when it’s cold. Swimming any sooner than three hours after eating. My daughter, Donella, would occasionally arrive at school with wet hair. The teachers would send her to the bathroom to blow it dry under the hand dryers so that she wouldn’t be in danger.

At the time, being a smug Californian, I knew that I had science on my side. These outdated ideas of wellness were amusing, but not anything to pay attention to. Then an expat friend from Brooklyn who was married to an Italian and had a young son and I started to notice a lot of odd coincidences. She was stacking wood one winter day in her cellar that opens out on a small street in our village. She was working hard, the sun was out, and she took off her outer jacket once she got warm, still wearing a heavy sweater and hat. A parade of grandmothers came by on their way to the market, and each warned her that if she didn’t put her jacket on she’d be sick the next day. The following morning she woke up with a bad cold.

Donella was outside one very cold and snowy winter day for hours without a scarf, then went out that night with her head uncovered. The next day, she fell feverishly sick and had to stay in bed.

I read an article that researchers have discovered that al dente pasta is easier to digest, and doesn’t release as much of a flood of sugar to the system as it does when softer. (Most Italians I know will not eat any pasta outside of Italy because it is always dangerously overcooked.) Other research reveals that your immune system is less able to protect you, and you are more likely to catch a virus, if you are cold.

What if the grandmothers are right? Stay safe out there.

January 11, 2019 In Best Of, Live By Nancy

A wrinkle in time

Some mornings when I wake up I look at the painted walls in our bedroom and think about time. When we started working on the house the walls in the bedroom were a uniform yellow. One day when we were chipping away at something on the wall some paint fell off and we discovered that underneath the yellow the walls had been frescoed with an art deco pattern in blue, grey, green, and purple. John and I spent most of our free time for the following few months on ladders using baking spatulas to chip away at the yellow to uncover what was below.

In one small section, a chunk of wall fell away and revealed yet another pattern below the one we were working on, this one with cobalt blue. We think we’ve pieced together that the earlier decoration was probably done in the 1700s, and the art deco one in the 1800s. They were painted because what is now our bedroom, which is on the second floor, would have probably been the living room at the time, as you would never receive guests on the ground floor.

But what interests me most is to imagine the thoughts and conversations of the people who stood right where I am now laying, probably having animated discussions about which pattern to choose, which colors, which painter. The same conversations, concerns, and inspirations of light and proportion of the room that John and I have had, but separated by four centuries. Sometimes I feel like there is a thin gauze separating us, and if I strain hard enough I can see through it to the other side, to those other people and times. And I am reminded all the time that we are very temporary caretakers of this little patch of earth.

There are a couple of spots of even older paint that we stumbled across. When we bought the house everyone believed it was from the 1700s, but when we started restoration it became clear that the core was much older. Our house is a big box, taller than it is wide. The core of it was apparently a three-story defensive tower/home, which underwent a major remodel in the 1700s to add another third to the side and back. (The picture at the top shows how many times windows changed positions on the front of the tower over the years.) As a historian once told me, if you lived outside a walled village you either lived with multiple families in a hovel, or a defensive tower. This older paint dates from when our bathroom wall was part of a tower. And you can go back and back. A very nice farmhouse that is near us down the hill was once a Roman villa. The tiny lane in front of our house was originally an Etruscan road. And that’s just what we vaguely know about.

A lovely friend mailed me a book called Here. In it, the illustrator Richard McGuire has imagined the snatches of life that have occurred in the place that is now a nondescript room, spanning hundreds of thousands of years. It reminds me to occasionally take a deep breath, no matter where I am and how modern it seems, to appreciate what a small speck we really are in a very long chain of events that have happened, and will happen.

January 2, 2019 In Best Of, Live By Nancy

Lepers, donkeys, and baby Jesus

Around Christmas every year a surprising transformation takes place in the small hamlet of Le Ville. A cluster of nondescript, fairly modern houses, and the adjacent garden plots and fields, turn into ancient Jerusalem.

Our local Jerusalem is inhabited by Romans, slaves, shepherds, spice grinders, metal workers, basket makers, rug merchants, a colony of lepers, and more, along with cattle, goats, sheep, and donkeys. At the center is always a couple, accompanied by a newborn, a bull, a donkey and a couple of angels. It is the living nativity of Le Ville, or “presepe vivente.”

I grew up in a culture where Christmas is all about the tree. In Italy, the most important symbol is the nativity scene. They are more common than Christmas trees—there’s one in every church, most homes, and some businesses. I even spotted one in the deli case of the cafe at the train station.

A few towns have decided to take it further and create living nativities. In 2005, some people from the hamlet of Le Ville went to a living nativity over the border in Umbria and decided that they would create their own. They started work in July of that year, and according to the organizers, “worked incessantly, every afternoon, late into the night” to make the Christmas deadline. It was small but a success and has grown every year. This year around 10,000 people will come.

It’s the thing I look forward to the most over the holidays. There are over 200 volunteer participants in 50 scenes, lit by over 1,500 candles and numerous open fires, with music from Ben Hur playing over speakers. The path through it is a kilometer long. There’s a cantina halfway through serving olive-oil soaked bread toasted over an open fire, and pottery mugs of hot spiced wine. The sheer pageant of it sweeps me along—Italians have a special gift for spectacle—it is not surprise that opera was created here.

It also has a nice Tuscan practicality. It happens for five nights between December 26th and January 6th—it can’t start earlier because there wouldn’t be a baby Jesus. The three wise men don’t show up until the last event, on Epiphany or Twelfth Night (when they originally appeared). They enter with great fanfare and head to the manger.

The competition to be the sacred family is carefully managed by the organizers so as to not hurt any feelings. Couples who have recently given birth take turns, and Le Ville leads the way in gender equality with three of the five babies this year being girls. Also, parents are parents—you don’t need to be married to be Mary and Joseph.

December 24, 2018 In Best Of, Live By Nancy

Hell’s Santas (on Vespas)

Christmas Eve in our village is not for the faint of heart. Santas of all ages, sizes, and both sexes come roaring into the piazza on every type of Vespa bearing sacks of presents which they give to the waiting kids. The piazza, dominated by a huge tree, is packed with a pretty good percentage of the village population. Sometimes one of the Santas bears a striking resemblance to someone you know.

Some years the presents are better than others. One of the first years we were in Italy the Santas gave out soccer balls to the boys and Italian grammar books to the girls. Our little four-year old friend, in the photo, was obviously delighted to receive a present that would yield so many hours of fun.

December 14, 2018 In Best Of, Live By Nancy

Ho! Ho! No.

I recently returned from London where I completed my tour of duty of some of the centers of the holiday universe: Regent Street, Liberty, Fortnum and Mason, Covent Garden … No one does Christmas like the Brits. Masterful holiday lights, bustling crowds, beautiful ornaments and decorations for the home, special things to eat, and, of course, everything you could imagine to buy as gifts.

thanks to Jeff Moore and Time Out

Then I returned home. Our valley is a kind of anti-matter to the London-style Christmas. The first few years we lived here I was stunned by the fact that there was virtually nothing to buy. Or to decorate the house with. Or to wrap presents with. Present options in our piazza include special housecoats to clean in. The farm stand has gift baskets with green peppers and celeriac. And there is this knitted lamp shade. The Santa (shown above) from the grocery-store-anchored mini mall sums it up.

There’s panforte, panettone, and things with truffles, but they can hardly compete with the goods on display in a big city. (There are exceptions to everything, of course. The family-run Busatti linens sold in the valley are revered around the world.) There’s none of that frenzied shopping bustle and long lines, except at the butcher.

I love this more relaxed version of Christmas. It was easy for me to think that my identity was defined by the presents I gave and how well-decorated my house was, but this world has offered up a different way to be during the holidays. Last year when I went to the sports store to buy ski wear there was only one set of choices, and you are lucky if they had the right size. There isn’t that treadmill of decisions about brands, performance, price, taste, and style.

Despite the lack of commercial Christmas cheer, I’ve never felt it more deeply. Everyone you meet greets you with an “Auguri!” and kiss. While running errands tonight I stopped by a church from the year 700, a stone’s throw from our house, while they were setting up the nativity scene. It gave me chills.

And this grabbed my attention as much as the lights over Piccadilly—what’s really going on in this life-sized manger scene near the piazza?

December 14, 2018 In Live By Nancy

Learn to be an Italian driver

John and I had lived in Tuscany for just over a year when we realized that our American drivers’ licenses were no longer valid in Italy. Unfortunately, we discovered the process of getting an Italian license is one of the most rigorous in the world. There are 10,000 possible questions on the exam. You get randomly assigned 40 on your test, which you have to answer in 30 minutes, and get four or less wrong to pass. And it is only in Italian.

The best way to approach this challenge is through a “scuola guida,” or local driver’s school. It is a sort of rite of passage in which sweaty teens and terrified expats are on a level playing field.

Our instructor for the written test thought it was better if John and I were taught apart from the teens, in a kind of “special” student way. We, and one other friend, arrived three times a week to a typical classroom with rows of desks and a big screen up front. A noticable difference from the usual classroom environment was the tire calendar with topless women on the wall.

Every week our instructor would run through his slides, a selection of possible test questions, and try to mime and convey in very loud and slow Italian what the question was about. John and I had been married for ages by that point, but we discovered a new aspect of our relationship—that we became cut-throat competitors when academic superiority and glory were on the line. Who first yelled out “vero” or “falso” to a question became a matter of pride.

The questions are intentionally tricky. “When you happen upon an unfortunate by the side of the road with a possible thoracic spine injury do you move them to an incline of 30-degrees?” “Does a 50cc. scooter have brake fluid?” “Is a pregnant woman required to wear a seat belt?” Sometimes I understood the question, but had no idea of the answer. Other times my language would reach its limit at an important moment: “When your car stalls within 10 meters of a train track do you cojidhfp immediately?” (Answer key: vero, vero, falso, and I still don’t know.)

The best part of this process was the relationship between the instructor and the class. It’s hard to imagine the lack of ego, endless humor, sense of equality between instructors and students, and amount of abuse that is coming your way when you enter the classroom. Our daughter, Donella, is currently taking the class and says that all of them laugh nonstop.

The class was asked: “If you happen upon an unfortunate by the side of the road, who is on fire, do you extinguish the person or wait for the fire to go out?” The instructor advised, while rubbing his hands together and with an evil grin, that actually “falso” might be the appropriate answer, because with a little olive oil, rosemary, and garlic … There’s a kid in the class who is the latest generation of a long line of morticians in our village. Unfortunately, for him, much discussion in class is about the possible dangers of driving—some possibly fatal. With great glee, the instructor always extrapolates to the worst outcome, then refers to the situation as being great for the mortician’s business.

This week one of the instructors was telling off someone in the class for an answer he thought was stupid, and kept yelling “Curse on those who teach you,”—implying himself. It reminded him of a recent trip to the post office that had amused him greatly. He was looking for parking, noticed a car leaving, and put on his turn signal to wait for the spot. The other driver seemed incapable of getting out of a parallel parking position—spending several minutes moving back and forth without making any progress. The long line of waiting drivers were getting impatient. Finally, our instructor got out, knocked on the window, which was rolled down, and he was greeted with a big smile. He told the woman how to get out of the parking spot. Turns out he’d taught her how to drive two years ago. He thought it was hilarious that she still couldn’t park.